Is John a robot?

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October 11th, 2009

Shortly after I began my tour of duty on the Meebo widget last year, a character who often goes by the name Krumbs and is responsible for at least a couple of the ridiculous Meebo conversations you've seen, hypothesized that I was most likely a robot. He then elaborated: "You're probably just a carboard box with buttons taped to it and lights that don't light up because the wires don't lead anywhere." From his description I had a hunch that he had pictured me to be something like AWESOM-O from South Park. That didn't seem so bad. However, he then fleshed out his hypothesis in greater detail with this flattering picture of J-0H-N:

In hopes of shaking the rumors, I managed to get my picture taken at various conferences. The ploy seemed to work for some time and the robot rumors subsided. However, more sleuthing was done on the forums and a discovery was made:

Najdorf's gif demonstrated that my facial expressions in all the photographs are exactly the same and he declared "It's proof that John is really a clever photoshop trick by the Rosen brothers." while Eagle0600 reawakened the robot theory proclaiming "We now have evidence that he's an android with only one 'camera face' programmed in."

It seems clear that Krumbs' hypothesis has been disproven but now I'd like to address the question at hand: Am I really an android with only one camera face programmed in?

No of course not, I just had more camera faces programmed in yesterday. I hope this puts everyone's mind at ease. What face should I make in the next conference photo, Le Tigre or Blue Steel?